


my sunshine

by laiguanlins



Category: Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Angst, DONGHAN N JIHOON WORK AT A CAFE, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, M/M, PanWink - Freeform, SO MUCH FLUFF, donghan, its late enjoy i love watering this dead tag, laji, linhoon, slight angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-26
Updated: 2017-10-26
Packaged: 2019-01-21 11:48:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12457128
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/laiguanlins/pseuds/laiguanlins
Summary: “Did the sun just come out, or did you just smile at me?”Or in which Jihoon is head over heels for his best friend, but Guanlin’s too dumb to notice





	my sunshine

**Author's Note:**

> panwink fluff bc y’all deserve it leave those kudos bookmarks and feedback ladies my twt is @guanlinsjihoon

Maybe it was the innocence Guanlin held in his eyes or maybe it was the gummy bright smile the boy wore that always made Jihoon’s heart flutter, but he’s known for long that he no longer saw Lai Guanlin as just his best friend

 

Maybe it was during summer of 2016 when Guanlin kissed his cheek under the nightly star lit sky of Seoul as a dare, that Jihoon felt his breath hitch, the warm lips making him want more. Because he shouldn’t have been feeling anything other than platonic for Guanlin. This was his best friend, this was the same boy he used to hold the hands of, dropping him off to school as little kids. This was the same foreign boy from Taiwan who could barely comprehend a single sentence in Korean. This was the same boy he used to bathe with as a 7 year old at his grandmother’s home

 

_Yet after a year of loving Lai Guanlin, Jihoon has never once regretted it, even though his heart hurt, it still beat at the same time_

 

 

Looking back, Jihoon never once woke up realizing the fact that he wanted to kiss his best friend on the lips, was it weird? Of course the whole idea of male and male was weird to society, but would it be weird to Guanlin? Would his best friend pry away from him, the boy who accepts everyone? Would Jihoon ever be able to tell Guanlin that he loved him? Maybe not, but it didn’t stop him from having high hopes

 

”Get to work Park-“ Donghan poked, laughing at Jihoon’s startled reaction from his deep thoughts consuming his mind, “there’s no one in the fucking cafe asshole”

 

 

” _I know_ ,” the elder stopped to snort, “you just started to look ugly with your mouth open, drooling on the poor counter” Donghan shrugged, wiping some tables, both of them dreading their shift always waiting for it to come to an end. “Where’s your little puppy?” the elder asked mindlessly, now taking selfies instead of doing his job, making Jihoon roll his eyes, “I don’t have a fucking puppy”

 

 

”I mean that skyscraper sized boy who always comes here to get free drinks off you, is he your boyfriend or something?” the blonde asked, angling his camera in ridiculous positions to get the perfect selfie, while Jihoon began to feel his cheeks heat up from the blunt statement. Unlike the rest of South Korea, the rarity gay of people were high, and surprisingly his co-worker happened to be gay, fully understanding Jihoon’s crisis of self identity and sexuality 

 

“He’s not my boyfriend,” the short male mumbled, pretending to be occupied with stacking cups, knocking them over stupidly, “but you want him to be your boyfriend, right?” Donghan shot back, causing Jihoon to knock more cups over. Hearing someone openly speak about his feelings towards Guanlin made him feel many unclear emotions, he couldn’t tell if he was anxious, nervous, or flattered. “No I don’t wish for him to my boyfriend, he’s too stupid to be in one anyways”

 

 

Having known Guanlin, the boy has never had any type of romantic interest for anyone. Sometimes it made Jihoon feel at ease, but eventually he fell back into the nervous hole knowing his best friend would end up with a pretty girl to suit him, while Jihoon would remain with his scattered and untold feelings 

 

 

Just as Jihoon was about to speak up again, the bell of their cafe went off signaling someone had entered, and it was none other than Lai Guanlin who had entered, his gorgeous porcelain skin, the dimpled gummy smile Jihoon manages to fall in love with over and over again was in view, and the world stopped. The boy he expected was in front of him, and he could never get tired of looking at the face of someone so precious, “Hyung! Sorry I came late today, I was at the library typing an essay and somehow I got a virus in the computer so the librarians kicked me out..” the younger boy pouted, nearly out of breath

 

 

_I want to kiss you so badly_

 

 

”Yah...how could you be so stupid Lai Guanlin?” Jihoon shook his head, helping the younger take his backpack off, settling on his seat. On the other side was Donghan smirking and giving him a thumbs up

 

 

”Burn in hell-“ Jihoon mouthed to the blonde, attempting to be threatening, probably failing, while Donghan responded by making ridiculous kissy faces at him, pointing at Guanlin along the process 

 

 

“Hyunggg I come after a long day to see my favorite person in the world and all you’re gonna do is taunt me? How unfair-“ the younger whined, dramatically flailing his long arms in the air with a pout

 

 

 _Cute,_ Jihoon thought but would never say out loud 

 

But what made Jihoon weak at knees was the fact that Guanlin considered him of all people his favorite person in the world. Jihoon could say the same too, a huge grin finding its way towards his mouth as he sat down in front of Guanlin, “I missed you too Linnie, how was your day?” the elder rested his chin on his hands, carefully listening to anything and just about everything Guanlin had to say, just hearing his silky deep voice made him fuzzy and warm, “honestly? It was shitty, I’m so tired and stressed from school and the sports activities and I missed you and I just wanted to curl up in a ball and hug you and finally I’m here with my best friend and I feel calmer,” the Taiwanese boy grinned lazily, tiredness evident in his eyes. Jihoon swore his heart began picking up, racing at a million miles per hour, but he also felt his heart clench because Guanlin was tired. His best friend didn’t wear the bright smile he always has on, he’s worn out and it made Jihoon upset

 

 

”Hyung can you make hot chocolate please?” Jihoon waved Donghan over, pleading the elder with his eyes when the boy was nearly out the door for his shift had ended, “wait no. Hyung I want it made by you _only_ -“ Guanlin stopped, staring Jihoon dead in the eye, while Donghan stared at the two of them with knowing eyes, bored from their little charades. His heart did that thing again, and Jihoon didn’t know whether he liked it or hated it, he didn’t want to misread Gualin, after all he was naturally so kind and good with words

 

 

While the two stared at each other for who knows how long, grinning like idiots, Jihoon jumped up as soon as Donghan awkwardly coughed, causing them to break contact, “I u-uhm gonna go- and yeah prepare that drink, b-be back” Jihoo stuttered, rushing from his seat to stand behind the counter, sighing after what felt like an eternity. The gaze Guanlin held with him, burning through his head because Guanlin was so beautiful, and he could never grow tired of looking into his large lost eyes

 

 

Guanlin held everything behind his eyes, Jihoon wanted to look into them everyday, wanted to see the glints in his eyes as he kisses him, wanted to be there for Guanlin during his tired days, happy days, he wanted to see the rollercoaster behind Guanlin’s eyes through the passing days. But it’s unfortunate that the boy would never feel that way, _“Hyung I want it made by you only”_ Donghan mocked behind Jihoon, startling him once again as he clutched onto his heart, “shut the fuck up dickhead” the shorter male mumbled, pushing past the blonde to prepare Guanlin’s drink, stealing glances at the Taiwanese in the process 

 

“You two are so in love oh my god, the way he looked at you and held your hand, pretty gay to me...” Donghan chirped, whispering in a mischievous tone as he threw some candies in his mouth, “I’m gonna throw this hot chocolate at your face if you don’t shut the fuck up”

 

 

”Feisty”

 

Instead of responding to the elder, Jihoon stepped on his foot, walking away towards Guanlin who looked like he was about to pass out from being so tired. Just how badly Jihoon wanted to hold his head, laying it on his lap, kissing his face all over, hearing his soft breaths as he falls in deep slumber. 

 

 

_If only_

 

 

Jihoon wishes he could fall asleep on Guanlin’s chest, hearing his steady heartbeats, he wishes he could wake up to Guanlin sleeping next to him, welcoming him with gentle kisses, he wishes he could call Guanlin _his_

 

”Drink up Linnie, then let’s head home” Jihoon whispered, pushing the drink towards the younger, hearing him hum tiredly, “thank you hyung”

 

 

As Jihoon kept his eyes fixed on Guanlin, but in a subtle way so he didn’t look creepy, he noticed all the little beautiful aspects of Guanlin. I mean, he’s always noticed them, but everytime he looks at Guanlin, it’s like he’s seeing him for the first time all over again, falling in love again, “but can I stay over at your place today? I don’t wanna go home, my parents have been pressuring me too much, and I just wanna sleep for once, especially in your arms”

 

 

No, _no_. Friends don’t say things like that, friends _shouldn’t_ say things like that. It explained how Jihoon’s heart began racing again, it explained how his palms began sweating, breath hitching as soon as the words left Guanlin’s mouth. But it wasn’t right, because Guanlin didn’t want Jihoon that way, so why’d he speak as if he did?

 

”O-Of course Linnie, just let them know so they won’t worry” Jihoon breathed out, seeing Guanlin grin in response, “pretty sure they only worry about my grades to brag about to other parents rather than my whereabouts-“ the younger muttered bitterly, looking up at Jihoon, _“at least you care about me”_

 

 

Of course Jihoon cared about Guanlin, this was his best friend. This was the boy who made his heart flip, the boy he wanted to hold forever, the boy he pictured a future with, grew up with. But it saddneded him that Guanlin felt like no one cared, when so many people did, “don’t say t-that, your parents do care and they love you or else-“

 

”No hyung. Do you understand that you’re the only person who actually has the decency to ask how I am? A simple question that can make me feel at ease, because someone actually cares about my feelings! Someone cares about my feelings rather than my results- gosh I’m so fed up, so don’t tell me that bull please...” the boy whispered sadly, so Jihoon decided it was best to drop the topic, slowly resting his hand atop of Guanlin’s large ones that engulfed his small ones. He wished his heart didn’t clench when Guanlin slowly traced his fingers over Jihoon’s skin, holding his hand

 

 

_”And I hope you’re the happiest Guanlin, and healthiest always”_

 

+

 

Jihoon was back in Guanlin’s arms, wrapping his whole body against the younger’s tall figure as they rested in silence. It felt so perfect, they fit so perfectly, how safe and secure Jihoon felt in Guanlin's arms couldn’t be described in words, he just felt security. “Hyung can you help me?” the pale boy spoke out loud, tracing his fingers down Jihoon’s bare arm, making him shiver upon the contact, “hmm, with what?”

 

 

”I need you to help me dress up for this date”

 

 

A simple sentence that made Jihoon’s whole body shift, suddenly feeling foreign and wrong to be in Guanlin’s grip. He felt the smile vanish away from his face, replaced with a frown, displaying his exact emotions. He felt everything shatter within seconds, of course Guanlin was asked out. He was Guanlin, he was beautiful and charming and not his 

 

 

Yet it hurt him to hear it. He’s never heard any sort of dating topics spoken by the younger, sometimes it made Jihoon question whether Guanlin was attracted to anyone, or maybe he just was too young to find interest, either way it pained him. Forcing a smile, as he got up from Guanlin’s hands, feeling misplaced, “w-when is this date?” the elder spoke the words, not having any care to the response or the conversation. But for the sake of Guanlin he pretended, because that’s always what he did; pretend 

 

 

“My mom’s friend has a daughter who apparently likes me, so they both set us up for a date tonight, and I don’t have any knowledge on these things so help a best friend out” Guanlin shrugged, seemingly showing no interest for the date either, but Jihoon could have misinterpreted since he was bitter

 

 _Best friend._ That’s all they’ll ever be, that’s the only title Jihoon will hold in his life, he’ll never dare of thinking them as anything more 

 

“I uhm can help you! I suggest dressing up casually, you suit anything you’re just stunni-“ Jihoon stopped himself after realizing his words, hearing himself praise Guanlin, “uhm you suit about anything so y-yeah, casual would be g-good” Jihoon couldn’t believe he was helping his best friend and crush for a date that wasn’t with him.

 

+

 

“And be careful don’t do anything stupid if she’s rude to you then leave because you deserve the be-“ Jihoon began rambling on minutes before Guanlin was ready to have dinner with a girl waiting for him. A pretty girl who got to call Guanlin her date, something Jihoon would never get to do, how envious he was

 

 

”Hyung! Calm down I’ll be fine, you worry too much” Guanlin giggled, pulling Jihoon in for a hug, and it took everything in Jihoon to not break down because his heart was hurting so much.

 

 _I worry too much because I love you so much idiot_  

 

He hated it, he didn’t want to be held by the boy who’d kiss another girl, someone else that wasn’t him. Jihoon didn’t want to be held by the boy who’ll be holding a pretty girl in a few hours. It was so wrong 

 

Squeezing his eyes shut, inhaling sharply, Jihoon waved his best friend goodbye, feeling his heart sink as the boy was slowly out of view, and his focus began to blur. He wanted to throw up, this was reality, and reality was a bitch. 

 

 

“Donghan hyung, can I come over? I don’t feel good and need someone to talk to...”

 

+

 

Ten minutes into the date and Guanlin was already beginning to get bored. Maybe this was why Guanlin never found interest in people- _girls_. Compared to how casually he spoke to Jihoon, how comfortable and happy he was, being around this girl felt suffocating. He couldn’t form a conversation, couldn’t find the right words, overall it was dreadful 

 

Around Jihoon, Guanlin didn’t have to force a smile, didn’t have to try hard, yet right now he was doing everything he avoided. When Jihoon held his hand, it felt so natural and normal, but whenever this girl would try grasping at his hand, he felt like pulling away and washing his hands with bleach, _the exaggeration was real_

 

But what threw Guanlin off the most was the fact that he was thinking of his best friend when he was on a date with a rather gorgeous girl. He shouldn’t be thinking of his best friend, another boy with a girl sat right in front of him. It wasn’t right, but it added up

 

Guanlin’s spent all his life with Jihoon, and that’s the way he wanted. He wanted his best friend by his side, he’s always thought he didn’t need anyone besides the elder anyways. As long as Jihoon was there, he didn’t need a partner to love or hold, Jihoon fulfilled everything. Because he loved his best friend more than the world, and he valued him the most 

 

 

“Guanlinnie-oppa, you didn’t talk much the whole night..” the small petite girl nervously laughed, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear as they walked along the pavement. He didn’t know how to respond, what answer to come up with because truthfully the night was boring and he could have been doing much more productive things. Like being with Jihoon

 

 

And there he went again, mind going straight to his best friend. It’s because he’s been glued to the elder, he knows nothing _but_ the elder, and he didn’t mind, because he wouldn’t trade the world for his hyung 

 

“I was uhm sort of tired-“ Guanlin nervously chuckled, sctratching at the nape of his neck 

 

“Oh! It’s fine, I had fun oppa, I hope we have a second date, goodnight,” the girl bid, pressing a lingering kiss onto his cheek, catching him off guard. And then she was gone leaving Guanlin behind with a shocked and confused heart 

 

 

 

_Because Guanlin shouldn’t have thought about Jihoon’s face when she kissed his cheek, he shouldn’t have thought about summer 2016_

 

+

 

 

“Guanlin?” Jihoon’s mother stared at him questioningly as soon as she opened the door to be greeted by Guanlin, “is Jihoon hyung home?” the younger panted out, breathless from all the running

 

The lady still stood by the door before slowly nodding, “he’s in his room”

 

Bowing down to the older woman, he slowly walked up to his best friend’s room, gently opening the door to be met by a sleeping Park Jihoon. He looked so peaceful, soft breaths being heard through the silenced room. Guanlin didn’t understand why he wanted to see Jihoon so badly, but that’s where his heart led him to

 

Guanlin didn’t know why his heart was pounding so badly, or why his body dragged him towards Jihoon’s sleeping figure, crouching down to meet his level, studying the boy’s face. Jihoon was extremely pretty? Guanlin didn’t know if it was appropriate to call his male best friend pretty, but that’s exactly what he was. Jihoon was soft, softer than any girl he’s ever encountered, he was small. Jihoon liked being held, often Guanlin wondered if he was the younger one or if it was Jihoon. 

 

 

But Guanlin liked babying Jihoon, because he liked the warmth of being around his best friend. But right now his feelings weren’t something you feel for a friend, this was different. Not realizing the way his fingers gently traced down Jihoon’s cheeks, feeling the boy slightly stir in his sleep, soft snores being heard from his pink parted lips 

 

 

_Jihoon was really pretty_

 

 

His heart felt weird, it did something it’s never done. He should’ve been feeling this way with the girl he was with tonight, not for Park Jihoon, but here he was with a wavering heart. Jihoon had pretty lashes, prettier than any girl’s, they were long and fluttery and when Jihoon blinked rapidly from becoming flustered, they softly tapped against his skin. Why did Guanlin know or notice that?

 

 

Or how Jihoon’s cheekbones would puff out whenever he rarely smiled with his teeth showing, or his cute laugh he never was projecting because he was too shy. Or how he covered his mouth when he burst into giggles, Park Jihoon was so bright 

 

And not caring of his heart, or his thoughts, Guanlin’s heart raced back to summer 2016 when his lips touched his best friend’s cheek as a dare, but tonight it won’t be a dare. Tonight his heart knew what it wanted, slowly leaning in to press his lips onto his best friend’s cheek, peck lingering onto Jihoon’s skin, eyes shut as his heart scattered into millions of pieces 

 

“Goodnight hyung”

 

+

 

Guanlin was avoiding Jihoon, and both of them were very well aware of that. Either that, or Guanlin just wasn’t as cheerful as he was 

 

The boy hadn’t come to the coffee shop for the past two days and whenever Jihoon asked to meet up, the boy simply responded with an “I’m busy”

 

It hurt Jihoon so much, it hurt him a lot like hell because Guanlin was most likely busy with his new girlfriend. The sinking pit in his stomach never ending as it kept growing because that’s what reality was. He knows he won’t have the same best friend he did before, the same boy who was constantly hip to hip with him. He knew eventually one day Guanlin wouldn’t be as close, _he just wasn’t expecting it so soon_

 

So Jihoon stopped bothering the boy, didn’t make an effort to text him for the third day in a row, looking clingy and annoying. Jihoon was probably annoying, that’s exactly what he was

 

”Hey, you alright?” Donghan whispered, both of them cleaning up the cafe before the shop was nearly closed, and no Guanlin in sight again

 

It felt weird, packing everything away early instead of keeping them out earlier, expecting a Lai Guanlin to pop through the door ordering a drink for his stressful long day, “I’m fine, why do you ask?” Jihoon mumbled, trying his best not to sound upset, sniffing as he wiped the tables. But a hand stopped him from continuing, looking up to seeing Donghan wearing a frown, sighing, “you haven’t been yourself these days, you don’t curse me out, you’re always dull and sad, you simply look out of it, plus lover boy’s not around here, and according to my assumptions it has something to do with him” 

 

 

Well his assumptions weren’t wrong, and Jihoon hated how observant the elder was, or how he was right. Because Jihoon was in a dreadful mood, all because of Guanlin

 

”He’s got himself a girlfriend now and can’t even care or bother to ask how I am, everytime I text to hang out he blandly replies about him being busy or whatever. They’re starting to sound like excuses so I’m just, yeah...” Jihoon laughed bitterly, realizing how much it hurt. How sad it felt to say it out loud that the boy he loved was taken and now ignoring him

 

”Look at me-“ Donghan stopped, lifting the shorter male’s chin up, “you deserve a lot better, some things aren’t meant to be. Just because this dumb prick couldn’t notice you and is now pushing away the best thing that’s ever happened to him- it doesn’t mean someone else won’t. You’re a great kid Jihoon, don’t mope around someone who can’t see or appreciate that”

 

He was right, Guanlin wasn’t worth his time. So maybe the pain and stress were the reason behind his repulsive actions, standing tall to capture Kim Donghan’s lips 

 

 

+

 

 

After kissing Jihoon for the second time, waving the boy off, completely ignoring the girl who expected something that he couldn’t give, Guanlin understood

 

He understood very well that Jihoon wasn’t just his best friend, he began to understand that he wanted to kiss Jihoon the way he should have kissed Chaeyeon, he understood that he only wanted to hold Park Jihoon’s soft small hands

 

This wasn’t a matter of Jihoon being a boy, or love. This wasn’t a matter of Guanlin never experiencing romance because he simply wasn’t interested. This was Park Jihoon, his best friend, this was the boy who could only make him happy. This was the same boy who climbed through his window at 3am to comfort him and hold him due to nightmares

 

Guanlin loves Jihoon the way any man could love a girl, and this was his best friend. His best friend who he could kiss and love the way he was told to kiss a girl 

 

So his legs dragged him towards the cafe, knowing he’ll never get the forgiveness he didn’t deserve. But it was worth the try, he wanted to be around Jihoon and that was his only focus. It was Jihoon and only Jihoon

 

 

He didn’t care about his feelings being all over the place, because one thing he knew for sure was that he’d always love Park Jihoon whether it be romantic or platonic. But his feelings were confirmed as soon as he was stood behind the windows of the shop his best friend worked at 

 

 

_Guanlin realized he loved his best friend when his eyes saw the boy’s lips being kissed by another man, a pair of lips that weren’t his own, and it hurt him._

 

 

+

 

Jihoon felt embarrassed the next day to face Donghan, so he was glad when both cleared up that he kissed him due to the heat of the moment. When their lips touched, Jihoon felt nothing, didn’t feel the warm fuzzy feeling he was meant to feel, instead he pictured Guanlin to be the face of the pair of lips 

 

And he wanted to laugh at just how badly in love he was, how hard it was to accept the fact that Guanlin wasn’t going to be his, or to move on. It could never be easy to move on from someone who made you so happy you wanted to cry, someone that made you forget all your problems 

 

 

Guanlin’s eyes shined brighter than all the stars among the night clear skies of Seoul, the glint of happiness held behind his gaze that always made Jihoon feel like he could breathe forever. The release he felt when Guanlin was around him

 

 

Walking along the pavement under the dim skies, Jihoon wondered how it’d feel like to have Guanlin as his. If in another universe Guanlin would kiss him like there was no tomorrow, both grinning like fools because they were so madly in love

 

 

_Their own little world_

 

 

As the thoughts circulated his mind, he passed by Guanlin’s school, hearing a figure run around the tracks. Who runs at 11pm alone? Choosing to ignore the unknown person, he began walking further until the face was much closer in view and that’s when he realized it was none other than Lai Guanlin, dragging his body towards the fence

 

”Guanlin?” Jihoon whispered at the panting figure who still hadn’t acknowledged him. Guanlin was breathing hard, wiping his sweat before he realized that Jihoon was calling out for him, heart picking up at sight 

 

“H-Hyung?” the younger swallowed down a large lump forming in his throat as he stood in front of the elder male, after days the boy was right there. And all his feelings came back, the lingering feeling of his lips and his cheek and summer 2016 kept racing back 

 

“You’ve been avoiding me.” Jihoon spoke in a monotone voice, it was almost scary at how emotionless he sounded, yet something along the lines of pain was laced within his voice, “hyung I’m sor-“

 

”No Guanlin, you’re not sorry, I was worried and I missed you and you just cut me off! I get it that you have a girlfriend and you have better things to do than to see your best friend, which I don’t even know if we are at this poin-“

 

Guanlin quickly cut him off, eyes widening upon his words, “I don’t have a girlfriend, you’ve got it all wrong. I’ve been avoiding you because I like you damnit!” the Taiwanese boy quickly clasped his hand over his mouth, eyes wide in realization from what he’d just confessed 

 

Jihoon didn’t have to know that, he had someone and Guanlin was just about to ruin it all

 

But instead the elder laughed, a mocking laugh, “you like me? Is that a joke Guanlin? Who told you I loved you? Someone must have, was it Donghan? Is this funny to you-“

 

Jihoon in love with Guanlin? Never in a million years would the younger have guessed that his best friend, Park Jihoon would say he was in love with him, never would have imagined it, but here they are, face to face

 

”You don’t love me, I saw you kissing Donghan hyung,” Guanlin shortly cut off, replaying the dreadful kiss in his mind, the scene making him nearly throw up

 

”Are you fucking kidding me? Guanlin, I’ve loved you for so fucking long it baffles me just how stupid you are to not notice. You’re so blind, do you know how hard it was to send you off on a date with another girl while my feelings for you kept growing? How hard it was trying to convince myself that we’ll never be anything more than friends? It hurt me so fucking much, and still does. And then you randomly avoid me, and obviously I’d think you were busy with the girl, I’m so mad but I can’t stay mad at you because I just love you so fucking much!” Jihoon breathed out, fists balling up by his sides, he felt so small and exposed in front of Guanlin

 

”When she kissed my cheek, I pictured you. When she tried holding my hand, only you were on my mind, I felt wrong being with another girl when you were all that was on my mind. So I ran to your house that night with confused feelings and then I saw you sleep and everything came crashing down-“ Guanlin stopped to grab ahold of Jihoon’s small hands, a sad smile forming on his lips at how perfect and _right_ it felt to just hold his best friend’s hand, “I saw your face and my heart felt so weird, I didn’t want to take my eyes off you looked so peaceful and so beautiful and it confused me! I’ve neevr felt that way, my body felt weird, and I kissed your cheek, and I didn’t regret it. When I ran to the shop and saw you kiss him, I felt this pang of pain in my heart, and I think that’s when I realized that I see you more than my best friend-“ 

 

 

Jihoon heard every single word Guanlin spoke, letting everything sink in, believing everything the younger talked, “then prove it” Jihoon whispered

 

And thats exactly what Guanlin did, in a flash of an eye his lips were pressed not on Park Jihoon’s cheeks, but his lips. He’s imagined and pictured how it’d feel, and it felt better than a dream, this was what couples crazed over. That warm feeling inside you that burst like a spark, being held close by the one you love. He wasn’t experienced at all, but somehow kissing his best friend felt like he was an expert, slowly moving his lips with Jihoon’s softer ones, letting his thumb trace over the boy’s soft cheeks

 

Jihoon was soft, and that’s what Guanlin kept craving, titling his head for a better angle, lifting the elder’s chin up as he bit down on Jihoon’s lip, earning a sigh from the boy, it made Guanlin grin. Kissing Jihoon felt like it was the most natural, easy and comforting thing to do, like their lips were only meant to be on one another’s, smiling when the boy opened his mouth, giving him access as Guanlin took the opportunity to dip his tongue into the shorter male’s nouth. Taking the time to explore his mouth, this newfound experience making his heart flutter, becoming weak at knees, feeling the elder’s short arms snake its way around his waist, pulling Guanlin’s body close to his, practically glued chest to chest

 

This was what happiness and warmth felt like, swiping his tongue along Jihoon’s bottom lip, before attaching his lips to Jihoon’s cheeks, gently kissing him all over, stopping to place one final last kiss at the top of his head, sighing in content as he held Jihoon’s body close to his. Both of them were out of breath, panting and breathing heavily, but their hearts were no longer heavy. 

 

Both were happy and found their answers. Misunderstandings start from avoiding and miscommunication, they were fortunate enough to find their way towards each other sooner than later 

 

Guanlin couldn’t fight the grin off his face as he looked down at Jihoon, pink swollen lips, lidded eyes almost blown out, cheeks tinted pink, he was absolutely gorgeous, and Guanlin wished his heart realized a little sooner. But maybe he did know all along that he loved Jihoon, maybe it was just something he couldn’t admit, but for now what mattered was the boy in his arms

 

”Guanlin?” Jihoon breathed out, a small mischievous grin playing on his lips as he looked up to meet Guanlin’s large eyes 

 

“Hmm?”

 

 

 

 

_”Did the sun just come out, or did you just smile at me?”_

**Author's Note:**

> IN FUXKXIFNFNF SCREAMIFNFNFNPLEASE LEAVE FEEDBAXK ITS 2AM IM TIRED GOODNIGHTHRHR MY TWT IS @guanlinsjihoon


End file.
